October 28th, 2011

Oh, my dear readers, I am so sorry that it took me so long to post again. As Maggie mentioned in her post, my pictures were lost on the desktop computer. In fact, some of them are still lost, but I've managed to get enough to continue on with my story. Thank you so much for your patience. :{

It was a wonderful summer. Robby and I spent many happy days outdoors, exploring the backyard, basking in the sunshine, and strengthening our friendship. I began to wonder if I'd just imagined things on our first outing. I never felt uncomfortable with him, or caught him watching me wistfully. It was such a relief! The last thing I needed was Robby falling for me. He was like a dear older brother, and I didn't know what I'd do without him.

Rapunzel and Eugene spent most of the summer busy in their quest for a baby, but Rapunzel did manage to set some time aside to spend with me. We caught up on all the girl talk we'd been missing. I tried to be patient and understanding when she could only talk about her future child. It was pretty easy, because despite her preoccupation, she was still a good listener.

I managed to continue avoiding Ben skillfully for weeks. In fact, the entire summer went by without a single word exchanged between us. Spies could have learned a thing or two from my stealth tactics. ;)

But eventually came the inevitable day, in late September, when I wasn't as on top of my game, and Ben caught me as I was on my way down the hallway.

"Belle, could we please talk?" he asked politely.

I felt my face catch fire. "I don't think that's possible..." I began, frantically searching my brain for an imaginary excuse.

"Please, Belle," he persisted seriously.

I relented. Might as well get it over with, I thought glumly. "All right," I said slowly.

"I wanted to talk to you about our last conversation..." he began.

"Look, about that," I blurted out, interrupting him, "I'm so sorry! I shouldn't have said anything. You have no idea how embarrassed I am...we don't need to say anything more about it!" I turned to make my escape.

"Belle," he said simply.

One little word, my name, and yet I melted at the sound. How sweet it was to hear his voice saying my name! I would have followed him to the ends of the earth if he'd asked me.

"Please stop apologizing. I'm afraid I didn't handle the situation in the most appropriate manner. You startled me with your sudden declaration, and I didn't know how to respond."

If I'd had a heart, it would have been throbbing in my chest. I felt woozy. Was he actually trying to tell me that he had feelings for me too? And here I'd been avoiding him this whole time! I couldn't face him, but I waited breathlessly.

"The thing is," he continued, "I am honored and flattered that you could feel that way about me, but...as you already know, my heart belongs to another."

The hope that had slowly been welling up inside of me died in an instant.

My heart belongs to another! A rather odd statement, considering the fact that as dolls, we have no hearts. I didn't find it humorous, though.

He must have felt unsettled by my silence, for he continued.

"Please try to understand, Belle. I admire and respect you, but I ache for Marguerite. Do you have any idea how it feels to love someone so much that it's almost physically painful to be apart?"

By now, the tears I'd been holding in were spilling onto my cheeks. How could you even ask me that? I wanted to scream. Instead, I turned and looked up at him solemnly. "Yes," I whispered.

He seemed startled by this. "Oh," he said quietly. There was silence between us for a moment.

"How long?" he asked slowly.

"I don't know!" I burst out, letting my tears fall. "It all happened so fast!" I struggled to regain my composure and forced myself to think. "I guess...about four months or so."

Ben swallowed hard.

Neither of us knew what to say. But then, I knew what I had to ask, even if I hated the answer.

"Do...do you think that...you might ever change your mind?"

Ben looked down at me sorrowfully. "I don't know," he admitted. "But I wouldn't recommend waiting around to find out."

I nodded bravely, pasting a wobbly smile on my face. "Well, that's...that's good to know." I turned to go a second time before I made a complete fool of myself. Perhaps I was already too late.

"Belle." Once again, his honey golden voice stopped me. I turned reluctantly back to him.

He smiled gently. "You are going to make some doll so happy one day!"

Tears blurred my vision. I wanted to make you happy, I thought desperately. I had no clue how I should respond, so I simply nodded and moved away before he could rub any more salt in my wound. I was determined to find a private spot where I could cry my eyes out for a good half hour undisturbed. I didn't want to see Robby or Rapunzel and have to explain everything to them. Not yet.

Later that afternoon, as I arrived back at my normal spot, I stole a glance at Ben. I was amazed to find him watching me with such compassion and tenderness, it was almost overwhelming! But in the next instant, it all faded as Marguerite and Raoul returned from their afternoon walk. Suddenly, he only had eyes for her. How miserable he looked! I pitied him. Because I knew exactly how he felt.